Sometimes I have those moments in church when I can barely hold back my tears, wishing that no one was around so that I could fully break down and release my emotions. The pastor shared a verse, one I have heard hundreds of times before, but it hit me in a new way today. To hear that I am saved by grace, not by anything I have done or not done, came across to me in a brand new light, as if I was hearing it for the very first time. To think that I don't have to strive to be perfect or do everything right, but that I can relax, and not beat myself up every time I make a mistake...to realize that I am fully and completely accepted just the way I am by the grace of God poured out on me...it brings me to tears. To think that I don't have to measure up or prove anything to anyone, but I can rest in the fact that God's love for me won't change no matter what...that is truly remarkable. Other people can look at me and judge or condemn me, but I know where my future and hope lie...in Christ alone. And his love for me surpasses any on earth and I wouldn't trade it for the world. I am so undeserving, but today I realized that my job is not to spend my life apologizing or striving for perfection, but for being grateful for what I have, making the best of it, and seeking to understand Christ and imitate him. If I get caught up in the logistics and legalism of religion like some, I would be completely ineffective and have no influence on anyone.

I just want to live my life, enjoy my freedom, love the Lord, and learn to be content in him. He is, after all, everything I need.