what are you waiting for?

...just some groundbreaking life lessons from my time with the Lord this evening:
Lately, as I blogged a few days ago, God has been revealing to me the lies I have been believing and that are thus controlling my life. Today I started a new Bible study that my sister got me for Christmas that is based on the life and book of Ruth. The first day talked about Naomi's family's trip to the land of the Moabites from the land of Israel--from the land of the covenant to a land that God had forbidden contact with. There was a famine in their land and they took the easy way out to a more fertile and seemingly promising land. The challenge was to learn to accept the place in your life that you are at (whether it's in a place of trial or prosperity) and stop trying to take the easy way out. Galatians 6:9 says, "Let us not lose heart in doing good, for in due time we will reap if we do not grow weary." If we are constantly striving for more and deceiving ourselves into thinking that we deserve more or that we can't be happy until we graduate, until we find a boyfriend, until we find a job, until we are engaged (that one hits home), until we get through this semester, or whatever that something that you're looking forward to is, then we are not taking full advantage of all the things God has blessed us with NOW!

We have to learn to take God at his word and realize that he has us where we are for a reason and that he is sovereign in all things. He will use our situation for his glory if we let him, but that requires us to set aside the things we want or think we deserve. As I was praying after I finished the study, my eyes shot wide open as God whispered a painful and devastating truth to my heart. "Hannah, you have to stop believing that you can only be complete and truly happy until you are married. You need to learn to take advantage of your single life, because I have great things in store for you. You have every reason to be happy now and to enjoy life and be my vessel."

I was dumbfounded. Girls around me are literally getting engaged by the dozens, and I feel so incredibly left out. I am more than ready for that stage in my life (or at least I think I am), but that doesn't mean that I should discount all the wonderful things I have going on now.

If we are constantly living our lives unsatisfied and anticipating something greater (other than heaven), we will miss out on all the great things that are already before us. The truth is that I have SO MUCH to be thankful for. I have an amazing family that loves me, I have wonderful and fun friends, I have a God who gave his life for me and wants to use me to reach others for him- now, where I am at this point in my life, and I have an incredible, loving boyfriend who loves me more than I could ever ask or deserve. Me previously believing this lie that I'll never be happy until I'm married has had an extremely negative effect on our relationship because I have been interpreting everything in the light of future marriage. It has prevented me from living in the moment, from enjoying this day, this date, this conversation, this distance, this growth. I am constantly looking and waiting for something better, for something more, and it has caused me to miss out on so many good things.

And I am done with it. I don't want to let another day go by that I miss out on things or take things for granted. I want to take advantage of every opportunity and realize how truly blessed I am and always see the many reasons I have to be happy. Right now.
♥