"I thank God I ain't what I almost was..."

First, I don't think it's any surprise that the title of this post is Eric Church lyrics.
Second, if you haven't downloaded the TimeHop app yet, go do it. It's this cool app that you can sync with all your other social media apps (Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, etc.), and it will pull from them to give you a kind of scrapbook of your posts from each day...1 year ago on this day, 2 years ago, 3 years ago, etc., for as far back as you've had social media. I'll admit, it's both the best and worst thing I've ever done. Some days, it's so fun to look back on all the fun, crazy, stupid things I was doing on this day when I was in college or grad school, and it's nice to occasionally reminisce about those memories (or screenshot things and send them to my best friend so we can talk about how ridiculous we were/are). Other days, it's honestly kind of heartbreaking to look back over the hard times, sad days, and depressing moments in my life (but also encouraging to see how much I've made it through). And then there are days like today, when I read a post that I posted 2 years ago, that, ironically before I even read it, was the exact same thought I had this morning when I woke up (kind of crazy, I know). Anyways, 2 years ago on July 24, I posted something about how I was thankful that I am not in control and that God doesn't always give me everything I ask for, because His plan is always best.
That was the first thought on my mind this morning, and then when I got on TimeHop and saw that from 2 years ago, I knew it was confirmation from Him. There have been so many moments in my past when I have felt frustrated and even angry that God wasn't answering my prayers the way I wanted them to be answered. I grew up in church, Sunday school, and a Christian school, so trust me, I know all the right answers: God's timing is best, everything happens for a reason, one day it will all make sense, God has plans for your future-to prosper you and not to harm you, God works all things out for the good of those who love Him....and on and on. And all of those are absolutely true. However, I am human. I doubt, I get confused, I want answers. This morning I woke up thinking about how drastically different my life would look right now if I had gotten all the things I thought I wanted (in regards to family, jobs, relationships...pretty much everything). But, as I've been looking back over things, I'm glad it doesn't look like I wanted it to look.
What I'm realizing is that I love my life.
Every bit of it.
I wouldn't change anything that has happened to me (even though to be honest there's been some pretty ridiculous, infuriating, confusing, and hurtful things that have really sucked), because all those things have brought me to where I am, which is I know exactly where God wants me. Most days, I literally don't even know what I want, much less what I need, but that's okay because God knows both and He is faithful. I am so, SO glad that God hasn't always given me the things I have asked for. As I look at my life now and the way things are (even though it's nothing like what I thought it would be at this point), I am realizing that, obviously, He really does know best. :)
In the words of the great Eric Church, "I thank God I ain't what I almost was."