A Birds-Eye View

There are so many things in this life that I don't understand. One thing I know for sure is that I am so glad that God is in control and not me. There are so many things that I would do differently, or that I would not allow to happen because they are painful, but I know that God's view of things is like a birds-eye view compared to my narrow view. He sees the future and how even painful things we are going through now can help us grow and work for the good of our future. I get frustrated sometimes because I don't see how some of the things that have been happening in my family can be good for anyone. From my perspective, isn't peace better? Isn't love better than divorce? Aren't forgiveness and repentance better than pain and lies? I just don't see it. I know God is good and I'll look back in a few years and be glad that I trusted, but right now-in the moment of shock and fear and pain- I'm not glad at all. I am angry. I've heard that it's okay to be angry at God, because He can handle it, but sometimes I'm not so sure. I know He doesn't expect us to understand all that He is doing, and He knows that our sinful natures will cause us to get angry and misunderstand, but I don't know how long we are allowed to be mad for, and how we are to approach God with that emotion.
I know I am called to trust. Called to be a witness for Christ in all times...and especially in hard times when people expect us to fall or waver. If God did miracles every day, it would be easy for others to see why we believe and trust. But it's when God says to wait, or doesn't bring that miracle, and we STILL trust him and have peace during the storm that we are really a witness. That kind of peace and trust is unheard of in this world. If I can hold fast during these times, then I can (and should) be a witness for Christ anytime.
God is good. All the time. Even when I don't see what he's doing or understand his plan.
"God owes no one anything. No reasons. No explanations. Nothing. If He gave them, we couldn't understand them. God is God. He knows what He is doing. When you can't trace His hand, trust His heart." -Max Lucado